Student Takes Love & Friendship Class, Finds Neither


Sophomore James Reimer had been feeling pretty alone at college lately. Hoping for any promise of companionship, Reimer scoured the spring classes and found the perfect class: “Love and Friendship”.

“I knew I had to sign up right away. While the goal is finding true love there, I’m fine with friendship. …I have no friends,” said Reimer.

Reimer mentioned that he found another intriguing course, Sex and Intimacy, but said he did not meet the pre-requisites, nor was he ready for that kind of commitment.

“You know how they say that you should ‘shoot for the moon’ because if you miss you’ll be among the stars? In this metaphor, the moon is love, and the stars are friendship,” said Reimer.

Unfortunately for Reimer’s metaphor, his rocketship has failed to launch thus far in the semester.

“Our first class day we’re asking each other ‘why do we love’ and having some background in philosophy I pulled out all my choice Nietzsche quotes for the small group around me. I thought for sure his sick quote ‘it is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages’ was going to get me some points with the girls. But they basically ignored me, leaving me with only the quote ‘to live is to suffer’ as solace,” said Reimer.

“Honestly, all this love and friendship just might not be cut out for me. I’m thinking I’m a better fit for the Death and Dying class…” said Reimer. “I think my best friend actually found his girlfriend there.

About pungry

Making strained metaphors funny.
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One Response to Student Takes Love & Friendship Class, Finds Neither

  1. Hank Turner says:

    Another touching Valentine sentiment

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